MOVIE REVIEW - Star Wars: Clone Wars

Bigfoot see CLONE WARS.  Bigfoot like little bit, but Lil'Bigfoot like lotta bit.


Bigfoot sad because realize he no longer target audience for George Lucas.  Bigfoot hatch from egg 40 year ago.  Nobody make movie for Bigfoot anymore.  Not cartoon movie anyway.  Lil'Bigfoot is girl. Lil'Bigfoot is 11 year old.  George Lucas make cartoon Star Wars for Lil'Bigfoot.  This make Lil'Bigfoot love CLONE WARS.

Bigfoot invited to press screening because he famous blogger (and know someone at radio station) Bigfoot allowed "plus one" so he invite Lil'Bigfoot because Lil'Bigfoot like Star Wars.  This screening big event because many nerd dress up as Star Wars character and some look just like actual character.  One man have remote control R2D2 that exact copy of real R2D2 (Bigfoot know that R2D2 not "real" he mean movie R2D2) R2D2 man have little boy dress like Jedi.  Little Boy cute.  Grown man dress like Jedi - not so cute.  One nerdette dress in Princess Lea golden bikini - very cute.  This one Bigfoot favorite - but R2D2 come close second.

Movie not start with crawl like regular Star Wars move - very beginning have "Long time ago in galaxy far far away..." and then Star Wars music - but no words telling story going back into star field.  Just voice tell story so far.  Seem like odd choice to Bigfoot - but he guess that need to show event in cartoon form as narrator say instead of word crawl because cartoon Yoda maybe confuse total idiot if not see and have narrator explain that this way Yoda look now.

Another thing confuse Bigfoot.  Samuel L. Jackson available to do Mace Windu voice but other actors not do cartoon voice?  What guy who play Chancelor Palpatine doing that he can't do own voice?  He busy play evil old man in potato chip commercial?  Not make sense.

Another thing confuse Bigfoot. If R2D2 can fly, why not he fly in first Star Wars movie?  Why not he fly all time? If Bigfoot can fly, he fly all time everywhere.  R2D2 at least as smart as Bigfoot. Bigfoot call "Bullshit" on R2D2 flying.

Another thing confuse Bigfoot.  If Jabba Hutt only speak Jabba Hutt language, why Jabba Hutt Uncle speak English.  And why Jabba Hutt Uncle speak English and sound like Truman Capote / gay version Mr. Peterson from Bob Newhart Show?

Bigfoot think animators do good job creating viable cartoon Star Wars universe. Script pretty good but dialogue as clunky as live action Star Wars film.  Bigfoot like new characters - but Anikin Skywalker new padawan little bit much.  Lil'Bigfoot like girl Jedi. Girl Jedi remind Bigfoot of Lil'Bigfoot in many way.  Bigfoot think George Lucas make Girl Jedi focus of new series.  Not sure how this work?  Girl Jedi die before REVENGE OF SITH?  Cartoon Network OK with this?  Not make sense if "Snips" (as Anikin call) just disappear or go off to college at end of series and not die.  Why would not Obi Wan or Yoda recall when think they are last 2 Jedi? "  Oh yeah... What about Snips - she Jedi!"

Bigfoot like every action scene.  This well done. Bigfoot have very, very high hopes for TV series. This appointment TV.  Bigfoot think film OK - Lil'Hacksaurus think film fantastic.  Lil'Bigfoot 11 year old girl.

LONG STORY SHORT:  Bigfoot like CLONE WARS.

CONCERT REVIEW - American Idols Live 2008

Bigfoot go to see AMERICAN IDOLS LIVE with Lil’ Bigfoot and her friends. Bigfoot like - sort of (like some acts but not like some).


Concert birthday present for Lil’Bigfoot. Bigfoot agree to take girls early to try meet idols and get autograph.

Bigfoot leave house at noon for 7PM concert. Bigfoot drive 50 mile to arena. Whole time Bigfoot drive girls chatter each other like monkey.

Actual transcript of 11-year-old girl conversation in back seat of Bigfoot car:

Yak yak yak yak yak David Archuletta yak yak yak yak yak David Archuletta Yak yak yak yak yak American Idol yak yak yak yak yak soulja boy yak yak yak yak yak yak Carly Smithson yak yak that song, you know yak yak David Archuletta yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak crank that yo yak yak yak yak yak David Cook yak yak yak…

Bigfoot get to arena before Idol bus. Idol bus come. Some Idols give autograph, let take picture. Ramiele Malubay first one give autograph. Kristy Lee Cook give autograph and also let take picture with Lil’Bigfoot and friends. David Cook and Carly Smithson come out for autograph but not come to Lil’Bigfoot. David Archuletta come to everyone. David Archuletta very nice, but not take picture.
Security guard tell people no more autograph.

Bigfoot take girls to Arby’s. Girl who work at Arby’s look just like Carly Smithson. Even have tattoos like Carly. Hacksaurus tell Lil’Bigfoot he take picture of all girls with Carly Smithson look-a-like girl who Bigfoot call “Arby Smithson”. Lil’Bigfoot not think good idea because real Carly Smithson not wear Arby’s Uniform. Bigfoot take girls back to arena for concert.

Concert go like this: Every Idol sing three song. Chikezie sing first because he Idol number 10. Then each Idol sing in order of get cut from show. Six Idol sing before intermission. Carly Smithson best one sing before intermission. She have strong voice and good stage presence. Carly is rocker and music not best match for Hannah Montana/Jonas Brothers crowd that make up ¾ of American Idol concert audience. Michael Johns also sing rock – but more in David Cassidy way than in real rock way. He have good voice and big hit with teeny bopper girls.

Intermission have very lame Guitar Hero battle. It go on way too long. MC of intermission have good stage presence and good sense of humor. He try keep it fun.

After intermission, Jason Castro and David Archuletta have strongest segments. Jason Castro only Idol that Bigfoot he buy CD from in future. This have more to do with Bigfoot taste in music than Jason Castro musical ability. Jason not have strongest voice and him have clumsy delivery. Jason Castro sound unique and entertaining. Jason Castro play ukulele and hum/sing and sound fill arena with 15,000 people. Not full band – just one weenie boy and toy guitar. That talent in Bigfoot book.

David Archuletta not only nice but also sing best. Sing too many slow song for Bigfoot but sing them well. David Archuletta project star power. David Archuletta young but Bigfoot predict long and storied music career. Bigfoot think that thirty years in future – David Archuletta big name like Elvis and American Idol just TV Show people used to watch back when people still watch TV.

David Cook go last. David Cook have good voice, but come off like big bag of douche. David Cook stand with arms folded like Mussolini. David Cook point microphone at crown to finish song lyrics (Bigfoot know this normal thing that singer do – but David Cook do it like he tired of sing crap song and make audience sing now) David Cook maybe nice guy but fame go to head Bigfoot think.

At end all Idols sing song about not stop music and take bow.

After concert Bigfoot wait by stage door with girls. Lil’Bigfoot get every autograph except David Cook and Chikezie. Bigfoot wonder why Chikezie not sign autograph – David Cook maybe look forward to graduate to higher class of fan than 11 year old girls. Bigfoot think Chikezie sing good but need every fan can get. Still, it long tour and maybe Chikezie good guy but have digestive issues from tour bus food.